We have been having a hard time lately. In our idyllic cottage in Devon, we more often have reason to celebrate than to slump around like Eeyores. But that is what we have been doing for the past week - all four of us. One has a cut throat (literally), one has work overload, another of us has unreasonable overtime and the last one of us has toilet troubles.

Plus, it's grey and dreary and we can't go to the beach in the rain. There, I'm done grumbling now. Sometimes it feels good to talk. And there is plenty of the good stuff on its way to brighten things up. Like my birthday (which is very soon indeed, but I won't tell you when, because of ID fraud and things.) (Oh yes, and take this, everyone who mocked me when I left Facebook 'cause of fraud: SOMEONE IN LONDON IS USING A FAKED-UP VERSION OF OUR CAR! With a fake numberplate and all. I know because I have been receiving his parking penalties. Who's laughing now, doubters? Me! Okay, not so much.). My birthday, on which I am hoping to be ridiculously spoilt. Um, then there's Valentine's, and as an unashamed romantic this is just an excuse to festoon the house and pets in red ribbons and paint chocolate on every plate. And guess what else? A birthday trip to Harrods soon, too. Mmmm....

See, there's so much good stuff, when you pause and think on it. In the meantime, in case you are living in a house of Eeyores, here is my recipe for White Chocolate and Pistachio Cookies, oh so buttery and oh so smartly irresistibly i-can't-only-eat-one delicious. You can feed these to anyone you like, no matter how posh they are. Oh but please be careful to just-cook them: they are best pale and tender.

love, a not-so-grumpy-after-all-me.

BUTTER COOKIES WITH WHITE CHOCOLATE AND PISTACHIO

3oz butter
2oz caster sugar
4oz self-raising flour
2oz white chocolate
1oz pistachios

Vanilla pod (optional)

Cream the butter and sugar as well as you can before your arm starts to hurt. Sift in (or just tip) the flour and stir it with a fork, gently amalgamating. The mixture will look fairly crumbly. Never mind: on a chopping board, set to the chocolate and pistachios, chopping to rough chunks. Add them to the bowl, with the vanilla seeds if you have any. Bring the mixture together gently with your hands: it will start to stick together as your warm hands melt the butter a little. Form into balls - about 12 - and flatten on baking parchment-lined sheets. Bake at 160 degrees for 10 minutes and cool on a wire rack. If you happened to have a tube of gold lustre in the drawer, it would look terribly graceful brushed over the tops when they come out of the oven. Or, just shovel and munch: it doesn't matter much.

TOFFEE NUT DRINKING CHOCOLATE
Hurray hurray hurray! I have been asked to start adding to the content on www.chocolatexpert.co.uk - and help build it into a baking, eating, drinking resource all about chocolate. Can you think of anything better? Okay, I am often to be found writing for a website - one day about finding work in Newcastle, the next about selling scrap gold online - but rarely are they as close to my heart! I can think of no better way to spend a Friday.

And while I'm here, and we are talking about chocolate, would you like a recipe for the Starbucks winter special? Well, not the official recipe, but an extraordinarily close approximation. Here's what happened: I walked past a Starbucks. The "Toffee Hot Chocolate" advertisement called to me. I stopped. It carried on yelling, with all its creamy, toffee-coloured might. "I'll come right back," I promised. And I did.

And seriously, could I get addicted to those things. Fortunately, as I wrapped my hands around the warm brown cardboard and sipped, I remembered that I had recently bought some Caramel Sale (Toffee Nut) Syrup from an online drinks store. It was, in fact, sitting in a dusty corner of the kitchen (with its friends Green Apple and Gingerbread) as I drank. So the next day, I whipped up a couple of Toffee Nut Chocolates for us, at home. Whipped cream optional...

Per person, you'll need:
3tbsp real drinking chocolate (I used 'Liquid' by Hotel Chocolat)
1mug-full of milk (measure in the cup and then tip into saucepan or jug)
2tbsp Toffee Nut (Caramel Sale) Monin Syrup

Having measured and emptied your milk into a saucepan or jug (depending how you plan to heat it), put the drinking chocolate and syrup into the bottom of your mug, add a splash of the cold milk from the pan, and stir it to a paste. In a saucepan over the hob, or in a microwave (go slow), heat the milk to just below boiling. Pour it over the mixture in the mug, and stir well. Using a handheld frother or the steam spout on a coffee maker, froth up the top of the milk, and sprinkle with cocoa to serve.

WHITE CHOCOLATE CHEESECAKE

I was pleasantly surprised by this cheesecake, which I invented for a dinner party last week. Because I let the food processor whiz and whiz and whiz the cheese mixture (while I mucked about doing something else), the filling turned out exceptionally light and airy. It's not a rich cheesecake, instead divinely light and whipped-creamy, so next time I'll experiment with the topping - perhaps a sharp, puce, raspberry puree, or some dark chocolate drizzled over the top as it cools.

12oz Philadelphia Light (2 packets)
2 eggs
3floz double cream
2tbsp caster sugar
6oz white chocolate
1tsp vanilla extract
2/3 packet digestives
1tbsp cocoa
2tbsp butter

Preheat the oven to 150 deg C / 250 deg F.

Start with the base. Melt the butter in a small pan while you whiz the biscuits in a processor to a fine crumb (or, like my mum does, put them into a plastic bag and attack with a rolling pin). Add the cocoa and whiz/mix to blend. Now pour in the melted butter and stir together. Press this mixture very firmly into an 8" round tin, applying enough pressure to pack it very tightly. Put the tin into the freezer for the crust to firm up.

Next, break up the white chocolate and put it into the pan you used for the butter. Add the double cream and set over a low heat to melt.

Now for the cheese: put the Philly, eggs, sugar and vanilla extract into the food processor and whiz plentifully - let it become smooth and thicken slightly.

The white chocolate should melt fast - stir until it's a smooth, creamy mixture, then scrape the whole lot into the processor. Whiz again until the mixture is quite thick and smooth. Remove the tin from the freezer and pour the cheese mixture on top. Slide carefully into the oven (middle shelf) and leave for 45 minutes. Then turn off the oven and let the cheesecake cool inside the oven.

Top with whipped double cream, coulis, fresh raspberries, dark chocolate, etc (see above).

BEST-YET CHOCOLATE CAKE

Under commission to research and write about "making the perfect chocolate cake", I've been living, dreaming and perspiring chocolate cake for the last fortnight. After hours poring over recipes and making a shortlist, at the weekend I managed to make my two finalists for the title of Perfect Chocolate Cake.

Finalist no1 (above) was a recipe belonging to a friend of the family, using a combination of yoghurt and sunflower oil. Having made Nigella's sour cream chocolate cake last year, I was hoping this new recipe would produce a slightly lighter, less intense cake. I swapped the yoghurt for half-fat creme fraiche (which I had leftover from chilli, in any case). After two trips to the shop (forgot the cocoa the first time), I blended everything in the food processor, and put it in the oven. An hour and a half? I was dubious, and checked after thirty minutes. The cake was black on top. Much cursing and oven-fanning later, the middle was cooked, and the edges were blackened. I took a knife to it on the wire rack, and sawed off the black.

It came out okay. In fact, a lot better than okay. The texture was heavy and moist, and the chocolate flavour was excellent. Two things could improve it: one, being spiked and drizzled with a thin coffee syrup as it came out of the oven (like my fabulous lemon cake), and two, being smeared with a milk chocolate ganache. The dark chocolate ganache I chose (an addict to the core, me) was a little bitter.

Finalist no2 fared better. I decided to do a traditional cocoa-flavoured sponge. I inspected recipes by Delia, Mary Berry and Sophie Grigson. Then I decided to make up my own. Basing it on the wonderful lemon cake that always turns out fluffy, I whizzed cocoa, flour, eggs, marg and milk in a food processor and threw it into the oven. It took me 10 minutes. 30 minutes later, the cake was cooked and cooling. I warmed 4floz of cream in a saucepan and melted 4oz of Galaxy chocolate in it. Then I put this into the fridge, and waited impatiently to assemble. Instead of waiting for the ganache to cool properly, I poured it over the cake until it was dripping onto the plate.

Despite the drippy ganache, the result was heavenly. I'd only made one half, since we'd already eaten enough chocolate cake to feed a large family, and nextdoor had received groaning platefuls. Next time I need a chocolate cake, this is the one I'll be making. Medium fat, light and fluffy, relatively easy on the waistline. Perfect!

PERFECT CHOCOLATE CAKE

8oz self-raising flour
3tbsp cocoa
2tsp baking powder
8oz margarine
8oz caster sugar
4 eggs, beaten
10tbsp milk

Method:
Sieve the first three ingredients into a bowl (or processor bowl), then add the margarine, caster sugar, beaten eggs, and milk, and beat until combined. Tip into two well-greased 8” round baking tins, and bake at 160 degrees C for about 50 minutes. Test with a skewer – when it comes out of the cake clean, the cake is done. Cool on a wire rack, and finish with icing of your choice.

REASONS TO EAT CHOCOLATE
As if you need them. Having undertaken comprehensive research, I'm pleased to present...

Five Excuses to Eat More Chocolate

Got a cough?
Take chocolate. Researchers at Imperial College, London discovered that chocolate is 30% more effective than codeine, which is the most common cough-medicine remedy. Theobromine, found in cocoa, was tested on volunteers with cough symptoms and didn’t show any of codeine’s side-effects, either.

Planning an adventure?
Take chocolate. Mountain-climbers, trekkers and serious adventurers are always advised to take chocolate. It’s been said to have saved the life of many a weak walker.

High blood pressure?
Take chocolate. Its polyphenols slow down the oxidation of cholesterol (which is what leads to blocked arteries) and it’s also suspected to prevent blood clotting. In fact, Mars is so convinced of its health-giving properties, it’s just launched CocoaVia: high-cocoa bars for people suffering with blood and heart problems. Mars claims the bars promote platelet activity (for good circulation) and improve blood flow.

Prone to anaemia?
Take chocolate. This trick is familiar to many women who suffer mild anaemic symptoms once a month. If you’re menstruating, dark chocolate is a useful iron supplement, and cheers you up too.

Need extra vitamins?
Ditch the pills and take chocolate. The humble cocoa bean is 3.5% vitamins, including calcium, iron, magnesium, sodium, phosphorous, vitamin A, thiamine, riboflavin and niacin.